Monday, April 20, 2009
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Bitch, I Don't Want Your Man!!
I know some of you guys enjoy reading (cause it's fundamental - stress on the "fun" portion), but this story comes out a lot better told, and not read. Hope you enjoy! As usual, feel free to "bitch," & share with a friend!
Monday, April 13, 2009
Americans Against Obama - WTF?!
Okay – I must be seriously late, because I was amazed when I saw this link on CNN under blogs regarding the hostage/pirate situation. I usually don’t do material on politics, but I felt compelled to discuss this one.
First off, am I the only one who finds it hilarious that we are seriously using the term “pirate” in 2009? I don’t think the hostage situation is funny in the least bit, but I just feel that we could have came up with a different name for these Somalians who boat-jacked the US ship. Maybe boatknappers – that would have been more appropriate. Because, when I think of pirates, I think peg legs, parrots, treasure chests with booty, swords, and dirty men with tattered clothes and big hats screaming “aaarrrgh!” – not a bunch of Somalians with machetes on a life boat. I admit to not knowing all of the details of the situation, however, I do wonder, how does one get boatjacked? I mean, I understand carjacking and how that happens – I live in Baltimore. You’re at a stop light, some crazy looking guy with a big gun rolls up on the driver side, threatens you (“brace yo’self fool!”), and takes your whip! But, there aren’t any red lights in the sea for you ever to need to stop. And not to be racist, but if I see a bunch of crazy looking black men with sheets covering their mouths with machetes and guns, and I’m in a bigger boat….shhhiiiittttt – full speed ahead biatches!
So, back to the title of this blog – this crazy website. Somebody took it upon themselves to create a website called “Americans Against Obama.” That’s deep. I don’t think I could ever have that much hate for anybody or thing that would warrant me creating a website against that person and constantly writing about why I hate them. In the article regarding the pirate situation they stated Obama was too busy picking out a puppy to worry about American’s lives. One of the comments even referred to someone as an Obama-bot. Crazy. I am an Obama supporter, and am excited with his presidency. I guess I’m just in awe of the amount of hatred folks can harbor inside of them.
Feel free to begin the “bitchin.”
First off, am I the only one who finds it hilarious that we are seriously using the term “pirate” in 2009? I don’t think the hostage situation is funny in the least bit, but I just feel that we could have came up with a different name for these Somalians who boat-jacked the US ship. Maybe boatknappers – that would have been more appropriate. Because, when I think of pirates, I think peg legs, parrots, treasure chests with booty, swords, and dirty men with tattered clothes and big hats screaming “aaarrrgh!” – not a bunch of Somalians with machetes on a life boat. I admit to not knowing all of the details of the situation, however, I do wonder, how does one get boatjacked? I mean, I understand carjacking and how that happens – I live in Baltimore. You’re at a stop light, some crazy looking guy with a big gun rolls up on the driver side, threatens you (“brace yo’self fool!”), and takes your whip! But, there aren’t any red lights in the sea for you ever to need to stop. And not to be racist, but if I see a bunch of crazy looking black men with sheets covering their mouths with machetes and guns, and I’m in a bigger boat….shhhiiiittttt – full speed ahead biatches!
So, back to the title of this blog – this crazy website. Somebody took it upon themselves to create a website called “Americans Against Obama.” That’s deep. I don’t think I could ever have that much hate for anybody or thing that would warrant me creating a website against that person and constantly writing about why I hate them. In the article regarding the pirate situation they stated Obama was too busy picking out a puppy to worry about American’s lives. One of the comments even referred to someone as an Obama-bot. Crazy. I am an Obama supporter, and am excited with his presidency. I guess I’m just in awe of the amount of hatred folks can harbor inside of them.
Feel free to begin the “bitchin.”
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Sexy: \'sek-se\, adjective: generally attractive or interesting
What is the definition of sexy? Some consider having a super hot body to be the epitome of sexy (even though super-hot can be left up for interpretation as well). Some think it's a person's charisma. Since I can't speak for everyone (and this is my blog), sexy is a look, a feeling, and an impression one gives off. We've all had moments when we didn't "feel" sexy, but for some reason, everyone in the supermarket was tryin' to holla!
Which leads me to wonder, is “sexy” something made-up? It’s not a one-size fits all description. What some may consider sexy, others may consider repulsive. We’ve all met those guys who say “I love me some big girls,” and we all know those guys where anything over a size 2 is wayyyyy too fat!
Being someone who’s always struggled with her self-esteem and self-image for as long as she can remember, I’ve always wanted to be considered “sexy” by the opposite sex. Even when I began doing comedy, I wondered how one could be sexy & funny – the 2 just don’t go together – but I’m figuring out how to make it work. The younger Ayanna always believed sexy would be achieved by being a perfect size 6 and wearing all the right clothes and always having your hair done and nails done and rockin’ the latest shoes, etc – you guys get the point. However, as I get older, I realize those things play a small part in the “sexy-factor” – 15% tops.
At the tender age of 27, as my maternal clock is a tickin’, my womb is ready (but not willing), I have a mortgage, and my student loans have really kicked in, my definition of sexy in a man has changed COMPLETELY!! I’m more realistic (or at least I think) with what I expect a man to have. My base rule, you need to have (or have a plan and are in the execution phase) what I have. I have a house, you need a house (or condo, or apartment with plans in the working of owning something soon) – I’m not screwing you in your Mama’s basement. In addition, grown men with roommates! Errrr! Fellas – there reaches a certain age where living in a phrat-like setting (skee-wee to all my Sorors) is not sexy at all! I have an education; I’d like you to have an education, or a CAREER that is upwardly mobile. I have no kids, I would prefer a man with no kids (I want to be spoiled and I can’t if you have someone(s) depending on you). I don’t want baby-mama drama, nor do I want to have to deal with whatever “situation” you’re in. “It’s complicated” is not sexy! “It’s complicated” or “what-had-happened-was” or “well, right now” (cause y’all know whenever someone begins to answer a question with “well right now” there’s nothing but bull-crap following) makes me dry up like the Sahara!
This is nothing but a very bare-bones description/view of my definition of sexy. I would love for you guys to give me yours. Also, shout out to my bestest sista-gyrlfriend Allison Banks for the topic idea (she told me I better shout her out – love ya girl!).
Let the “bitchin” begin!!
Which leads me to wonder, is “sexy” something made-up? It’s not a one-size fits all description. What some may consider sexy, others may consider repulsive. We’ve all met those guys who say “I love me some big girls,” and we all know those guys where anything over a size 2 is wayyyyy too fat!
Being someone who’s always struggled with her self-esteem and self-image for as long as she can remember, I’ve always wanted to be considered “sexy” by the opposite sex. Even when I began doing comedy, I wondered how one could be sexy & funny – the 2 just don’t go together – but I’m figuring out how to make it work. The younger Ayanna always believed sexy would be achieved by being a perfect size 6 and wearing all the right clothes and always having your hair done and nails done and rockin’ the latest shoes, etc – you guys get the point. However, as I get older, I realize those things play a small part in the “sexy-factor” – 15% tops.
At the tender age of 27, as my maternal clock is a tickin’, my womb is ready (but not willing), I have a mortgage, and my student loans have really kicked in, my definition of sexy in a man has changed COMPLETELY!! I’m more realistic (or at least I think) with what I expect a man to have. My base rule, you need to have (or have a plan and are in the execution phase) what I have. I have a house, you need a house (or condo, or apartment with plans in the working of owning something soon) – I’m not screwing you in your Mama’s basement. In addition, grown men with roommates! Errrr! Fellas – there reaches a certain age where living in a phrat-like setting (skee-wee to all my Sorors) is not sexy at all! I have an education; I’d like you to have an education, or a CAREER that is upwardly mobile. I have no kids, I would prefer a man with no kids (I want to be spoiled and I can’t if you have someone(s) depending on you). I don’t want baby-mama drama, nor do I want to have to deal with whatever “situation” you’re in. “It’s complicated” is not sexy! “It’s complicated” or “what-had-happened-was” or “well, right now” (cause y’all know whenever someone begins to answer a question with “well right now” there’s nothing but bull-crap following) makes me dry up like the Sahara!
This is nothing but a very bare-bones description/view of my definition of sexy. I would love for you guys to give me yours. Also, shout out to my bestest sista-gyrlfriend Allison Banks for the topic idea (she told me I better shout her out – love ya girl!).
Let the “bitchin” begin!!
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